goodbye lola

I never had the oppurtunity of meeting my parents' mothers. My father's mother died when he was in 4th grade. She was a high-diver, a beautiful and fashionable lady. My mother rarely talks about her mother. She left their home when my Mama was young leaving our lolo to take care of the family.

Everytime my parents would introduce someone as "lola", I would enjoy listening to their stories and receiving gifts from them regardless of its monetary value. I have some lolas back in the province who would kiss us lovingly but we would categorized it more of a long sniff.

My earliest memory of Lola Angging, who was my father's aunt, was back when I was kid and she gave me rosary that she made. She told me to include her in my prayers whenever I would pray the rosary. I was never an obedient Catholic girl. I rarely prayed the rosary. I do not go to Church every Sunday. The last time I confessed my sins to a priest was back in 6th grade. But whenever I would pray, I would always say "Bless everyone" so that nobody would get left behind.

The other night, Papa received a message that Lola Angging is dying. I didn't know how to react on that. But there were so many things that I wanted to ask her about our family, about the legacy of the Martinez of Pontevedra.

Before dinner Tita Jane texted Papa saying that Lola Angging passed away. All I said was 'Oh'. Wala na... I have absorbed everything and currently grieving about the late Milagros Martinez-Perez. Part of me feels guilty that I didn't pray enough for her, that I didn't take care of the rosary that she gave me.

I won't be able to say a proper goodbye for she will be buried in Bacolod. Because of school and financial constraints, I won't be able to see her loving face for one last time. Same reasons why I wasn't able to attend the burial of two Aunts two years ago. Hay...

Goodbye Lola.